18 January 09
Struggling to be positive
I’ve been running on some amazingly negative energy lately. Over-tired, over-stressed, overwhelmed, over it all. And I’m not happy about a lot of things, but I think I’ve been investing so much energy into thinking about all the things I’m not happy about that I’ve not been thinking about things that I am happy about. And I’ve been spending so much of time just assuming that things won’t get better until X is over and I have more time.
I had a great weekend. Spent time this week with some amazing friends who are all creative people and who enjoy spending time with me. And as a result, I’m feeling like I’ve been taking to much in and not expending any of the good, positive, creative energy. And I need to start doing that. I need to start making things and showing them off. Its a simple thing that truly makes me happy.
One of the things I’m most happy about is a sweater that I made for Andrew. He’s worn it already but I haven’t taken a picture of him in it, but I will next time he wears it and then I’ll get to share it. Weaving the ends into this striped sweater had me swearing up a storm, but in the end, it was worth it. It fits him very well and he seems to like it and he’s gotten (and I’ve gotten) several compliments already. So I’m thrilled to show it off.
And I’ve already started the next sweater. Which is actually a redo of a sweater that I already made and then realized I’d made it too small and needed to remake it. So I spent Saturday ripping out and casting on after doing some math. Now I just need to refigure out the chart.
And I’ve made a number of bags that I need to take decent pictures of so I can post online. This waiting for the perfect light thing isn’t happening (Jen told me how few days of sunshine Chicago has and it about broke my heart). So I really need to invest in making the photo screen idea I had once before. I’ve got the hardware, just figured out what would make perfect scrim material, and now I just need some time. Which has been my excuse for far too long. And then I need lights. I’ve got two external flashes left over from my photo school days (and Andrew’s) so I just need a way to make them go off at the same time so I can start setting up some experiments and seeing how it will look best.
I have the creative desire, now I just need to rustle up some creative energy tomorrow, and start carving out more creative energy over the next few weeks. It will happen. No matter what, I will make it happen.
Comments
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i know the feeling, dude. all my negative feelings are overwhelming everything else and doing basically nothing to resolve the crapass negative situation.
as to the flashes, i can come over and press the switch on one of the lights while andrew presses the other one and you shoot the picture. i’m just sayin’. ;)
— carolyn on Jan 19, 01:19 pm
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Way to turn my entire post into a sentence (without proper capitalization or punctuation, even). But yeah, that’s pretty much dead on.
I see a trip to Central Camera in my future. Those dudes will know what I need. I hope. They may even have affordable used lights.
— Cinnamon on Jan 20, 09:40 pm
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